Just In The Niche Of Time

If it's not one thing it's another. Sometimes ten others. I never seem to have enough time at the end of the day. It would be nice if you could bottle time and then when you need it just shake a little bit out. I began thinking about time in a bottle; actually "Time in a Bottle" by Jim Croce. The song was released in in 1972 when I was in high school. I didn't know it then, but he wrote the song for his then unborn son, AJ Croce. Then in 1973 Jim Croce met his untimely death in a plane crash. Three months later his song hit #1. AJ was born and then he suffered from a brain tumor and became blind only to regain some vision in his left eye a few years later.

Wow! I didn't mean to go down that road quite so far. It seems that before I knew it I was wandering and wandering down the road when I only meant to stop and look for a moment.

Now back to my time issue.

I've heard people say before that they were so poor that they couldn't pay attention. Do think time has become devalued just like our money? I mean when I was little bread cost 10 cents a loaf and I had plenty of time to play and have a great time outside. Nowadays, some bread can cost $3 to $4 a loaf; that's the high dollar bread, hand made stuff mind you. I can still find good old machine made Mrs. Baird's regular white bread for under $2; but that is still a far cry from 10 cents.

I guess what I'm saying is that the money to buy the bread is just like time during the day. There simply isn't enough of it. I suppose now that I'm older I have more to do than simply play outside. Maybe I have to work a little; No make that a lot, just to buy that 10 cent loaf of bread that is selling for $2.

You know, I could probably make a million dollars if I could develop dehydrated time. You know what I'm talking about; just add water and poof there you are, more time. I tried making dehydrated water water once. It worked really well, I just added water and there it was. Didn't sell though. I guess there simply wasn't a market niche yet. Maybe now people would buy a bottle of dehydrated spring fed glacier water imported from outer edge of Inner Mongolia. Just Add water! (And Time)

By the way; the title thing up above, I did mean to say "Niche" so don't write to tell me that it should be "Nick" or "Nicholas" or some other such thing.

© 2009 Barry T Horst


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Einstein Is Alive and Well......

......and working at JC Penney here in Waco.

As many Americans do after Christmas, I hit the stores to make a few returns yesterday morning.

I headed out to JC Penney armed with the items to return and the appropriate receipts. I found a service desk and dutifully waited in line. My turn came and I reported to the register and explained my reasons for being there so bright and early, "My wife asked me to return these. She decided that she didn't want them! Here are the receipts for them. Oh, my daughter changed her mind on this also!"

I gave the clerk 3 fleece throws for $7.99 each and a box of perfume for $19.99 and the receipts for all items. The clerk scanned the first receipt and started to scan the items. I noticed that she seemed to be having some difficulties. My first clue was when she started muttering to herself saying that the computer said I had already returned one of the items.

I thought to myself, "How did I do that? I have it right here with me."

The clerk tried a few more key strokes confident that she could solve the dilemma. No luck.

Next thing I knew she had the PA in hand and I heard, "I need the MOD at the home department register."

The MOD reported promptly and took one look at the register and announced, "You've already taken this back. That's what the computer says."

I said, "I don't think so. I have it here and here's the receipt."

MOD, "Well maybe your wife changed her mind earlier and exchanged it with this receipt for something different!"

I thought to myself, "Then why do I still have the same exact item in my posession that the computer says I've already taken back? If she did that I wouldn't have that item anymore."

The MOD then tells me, "I can return the other items and credit your charge card but you'll need to look for the correct receipt for the other item."

"OK," and the MOD began to credit the returns to my charge card for each item for $7.99 each; which by the way, is the price listed on the receipt. (This fact is very important later on.) I then asked the MOD what I needed to do if I couldn't find the receipt.

He said, "If you can't find the receipt we can credit your charge card for $7.99."

I thought to myself, "Isn't that what I've been trying to do but you won't let me since I don't have the correct receipt?"

Then, being the bold person that I am I asked, "Instead of looking for the receipt at home could you go ahead and credit my account now for $7.99?" I did this while thinking to myself, "Which is what I paid for it earlier, as plainly indicated on the receipt that you have been looking at lo these several minutes!"

The MOD responded, "Sure, as soon as I finish this return!"

HUH!!!

© 2009 Barry T Horst


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Did Aye Sea That Rite?

I was watching the news this afternoon on our local CBS affiliate, KWTX-TV when they posted the following Burn Ban notice:

Now, either they were in a hurry to get it on the air or .... well, they were not paying any attention.

1st-"limestone" should be capitalized. After all, it is the name of a nearby county-Limestone County.

2nd-"McClennan" is not a county in Texas. perhaps they meant McLennan County.

3rd-I have never heard of "ariel" fireworks. "Lion of God" fireworks may sound good, but I don't think that is what they meant. Again perhaps, AERIAL fireworks is more in order.

Way to go Channel 10!

PS-In their defense Channel 10 is not alone in their....hmmm....eggcorn or just plain misspellings. Witness this by viewing the many other uses found by Google for "Ariel Fireworks".

© 2008 Barry T Horst


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And Now, Something A Little Different

I have often been amused by certain words and terms. I mean sometimes they just don't sound right.

I went to the grocery store the other day and tried to go through the "self-check out" lane and saw a sign on the scanner that said, "OUT OF ORDER".

What did that mean?

Should I have done something else first?

Would it work if somebody brought some "ORDER" to it?

That's along the same line as when someone says. "It's out of whack!

"WHAT???

Out of whack? Why I've never seen any whack. (And if I had, I don't think I'd tell anyone!) I suppose it's too simple to say, "AIN'T WORKIN'!"

But that leads us down another road. "AIN'T" Some people say that "AIN'T" ain't a proper word to use.

Excuse me!!!! Some people say "AIN'T" isn't a proper word to use.

Well for a word that's not proper, it's sure been around for a while. Since 1685 to be exact, more or less.And think of all the people that have used it, besides me. Sojourner Truth gave a speech entitled, "Ain't I A Woman?" Lewis Carroll used "AIN'T" in his "Through The Looking Glass" as did Al Jolsen in the Jazz Singer. The use of the word "AIN'T" even cropped up in the last presidential election when Sarah Palin used it during the vice presidential debate and Barack Obama used it during his speeches on the stump to say, "That ain't right!"

And lest we forget, Bugs Bunny's, "Ain't I a stinker?"

© 2008 Barry T Horst


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Picture Monday, December 29, 2008

While researching some pictures taken earlier this year I came across a few that I wanted to share on this final Picture Monday of 2008. The first picture is a picture I took of the Texas flag one afternoon this summer. I took this picture around 6:00 PM on this particular afternoon. I was facing east and there was a stiff breeze blowing out of the north. I wanted to get the flag with the sun setting behind it so that the flag would appear to glow when the sun shone through it. The only problem with this was the flag would appear backwards with the star on the right-hand side. Afterwards I came home and reversed the image and then enhanced the background glow to get a better effect. I liked the result.

The picture below was taken before the Texas A&M vs. Baylor game this year. The US Army Air National Guard flew these 3 Apache helicopters over the field prior to the game. The landed at the TSTC airfield and came to the game. Later the pilots were honored by the crowd with a rousing ovation.

At the same A&M vs. Baylor game there was a star sitting near me. I took his picture. This is Bill Young from the local CBS affiliate, KWTX-TV Channel 10. He seemed to try to keep a low profile. I was impressed with his sunglasses. Look at the D&G on the side. The letters appear to be Green and Gold, the Baylor colors.

I told my daughter, "He must have found those at Dollar General! See the DG on the side."

Julie said, "No Dad! Those are Dolce & Gabbana sunglasses!"

"Is that better than Dollar General?"

"Yes Dad! That's better than Dollar General!"

You learn something new everyday!

© 2008 Barry T Horst


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Santa Claus' Punch and Judy

My haven't things changed in the last 60 years! I came across this old Christmas film from 1948. Children then enjoyed much simpler toys and entertainment. Society was much less obsessed with being "Politically Correct". Sit back and enjoy the entertainment.

© 2008 Barry T Horst


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